This movie was awesome when it first came out, and surprisingly it stands the test of time (mostly). The premise is simple: a ship and its crew are sent to a remote location near Neptune to search for a space exploration ship called "Event Horizon" that went missing for seven years. The crew is accompanied by Dr. Weir (played by Sam Neill), the guy…
Oh, Peter Billingsley. Little Ralphie from A Christmas Story plays Billy, a kid who is on a road trip with his mom and mom's boyfriend. While at a stop on the way through Death Valley, Billy stumbles upon a fresh murder scene. Being the oblivious child that he is, he bypasses the dead bodies and picks up (steals) a small frog necklace. It turns…
Dina Meyer is a bat scientist and Lou Diamond Phillips is sheriff bad ass. They join forces when genetically-modified bats start terrorizing a small town in Texas. Can they outsmart these bats before it is too late? Honestly, just let the government nuke the town. Wowy wow wow. This one reeks of bat guano. The story is the most formulaic you can get. The…
Chucky is back in the reboot no one wanted. Instead of a serial killer-possessed doll, he's a robotic companion doll for kids without any safety protocols. Aubrey Plaza plays the mother who brings home the defective doll to her son Andy. Mark Hamill is the voice of Chucky. I liked the technology update and parts were OK, but it felt like it was something…
A group of college kids on vacation get a flat tire and one of them goes missing trying to get it fixed. As the others search for him, they have car trouble and come across a weirdo who owns a waxwork/mannequin museum. The weirdo offers to help them fix their car, but you know it's too good to be true. A masked killer starts…
From cinematic master John Carpenter comes this Stephen King-esque movie about kids with glowing eyes and special psychic killing powers. After a strange event leaves most of a small town unconscious for six hours, an alarming number of women are suddenly pregnant after waking from the "blackout." The babies are all born in a short time and develop faster than normal children. As the…
I've always had a soft spot for the little murder doll, Chucky. The premise has always been slightly creepy and monumentally absurd. But, hey, just roll with it. I rather like this installment because of how campy and over-the-top it is. Having come out 7 years after the third Child's Play movie, it had to essentially reboot the franchise to keep things fresh. It…
The third in the franchise about the murderous hillbilly cannibal family from Texas. This one returned to the grittier roots of the first movie, and abandoned the campy tone of the second one. Though, there is still a little bit of camp (and we welcome it). The story follows Michelle and Ryan (human fodder), a couple who are travelling through Texas on the way…
In 1999, there was a fun little movie called "House on Haunted Hill" that was a remake of the 1959 Vincent Price movie. This movie is the 2007 direct-to-video sequel to the 1999 movie. Let me start by asking the question: "Has there ever been a good direct-to-video movie?" The answer is that most times the movie is dog shit and releasing to video…
Based on the 1955 novel by Jack Finney, a planet-wide alien takeover begins on the down low by replacing people with emotionless clones grown in pods as the people sleep at night. Teenage girl, Marti, moves to a military base with her family, makes friends with a rebellious Army brat, and finds an unlikely love interest in the form of a hunky chopper pilot.…
