I vaguely remember seeing this movie in the theater when it came out. It's one of those horror movies that tries really hard to be exactly like every other horror movie, but it keeps moving fast enough to engage the viewer. The beginning shows an anthropologist guy in South America involved in some tribal ritual before heading back to Chicago with some cargo for…
This is definitely one of the worst movies I've seen in a long time. It almost starts to venture back into the "so bad it's good territory". The basic premise is that a meteor crash lands on a farm and this alien goop seeps into the water, which then starts turning people into acne monsters with zombie-like tendencies. The only real "talent" involved is…
As a teenage boy, this movie had everything. Blood, aliens, and boobs. The story starts with a prologue implying that S.E.T.I. picked up on some alien radio transmission. It then dives straight into the action with a super human teen girl escaping from a government research facility. The head of the facility, played by Ben Kingsley, assembles a team of scientists (and a hitman)…
This is Italian horror at its finest. Directed by Lucio Fulci and Bruno Mattei, Zombi 3 is a schlock rip-off of Romero's Night of the LivingDead series. Everything about it is over-the-top, outrageous, and extreme. The story starts with a scientist injecting a corpse with a serum he created called Death One. The corpse comes back to life and thus begins our odyssey. The serum…
A dumpster-diving father (Ryan Phillipe) finds an ornate Chinese box and gives it to his daughter, Clare (Joey King), as a gift. Little does she know, the box grants its owner seven wishes in exchange for a blood price. In other words, with every wish, someone dies. It's kind of a Wishmaster meets Final Destination movie, and it somehow works out even though the movie is a…
It's crazy that this is the 9th year of doing 31 horror movie reviews in October. At one point, a couple of years ago, I thought I'd run out of horror movies, but not only are there thousands I've never seen, there are at least 30 coming out new each year. I have an enormous spreadsheet of possible horror movies and it keeps growing.…
Jordan Peele of Key & Peele makes his directorial debut with this unconventional horror story that puts a creepy, psychological twist onGuess Who's Coming To Dinner. Chris (Danial Kaluuya) and Rose (Allison Williams) travel to the country to visit Rose's parents for a weekend getaway. Things get cringey and awkward as more people arrive for some sort of gathering and treat Chris in unusual ways.…
Based on a crappy Dean Koontz novel, Odd Thomas (Anton Yelchin) is a likable guy who can see dead people and other ghastly creatures. He uses his special skills to fight the forces of evil and avenge the dead. Things start to spiral out of control as Odd starts to piece together a plot by some crooked cops to carry out a massacre at a…
The new era of horror comedy is under way. With the success of movies like Piranha 3D and Sharknado,the floodgates opened to allow for a wide range of crazy ideas, many involving some sort of animal. The movie starts with a canister of bio hazard waste falling off of a truck, which makes its way downstream to a beaver dam and breaks open. The story shifts…
Part 3 is where things go a little bit nutso. The movie picks up roughly where the last one left off, but quickly side-steps into new territory. Jigsaw/John Kramer is bed-ridden with the full effects of his cancer taking over. His lady accomplice kidnaps a surgeon to perform a cranial surgery to relieve pressure from his brain. Meanwhile, a grieving father is playing the…
