It's tough being a 30-year-old dude teenager who knows your next door neighbor is a vampire and yet no one will believe you. So, you take your dumbass to the washed up vampire hunter actor turned TV personality to ask for help. What could go wrong? For a mid-80s horror classic, the movie has a great concept, but falls short on some of the…
Noa (Daisy Edgar-Jones) is a simple girl with simple problems. She has trouble dating and finding the right guy until Steve (Sebastian Stan) finds her in a supermarket. The two hit it off and the next thing you know, they are off to a surprise weekend getaway in a remote wooded location. RED FLAG ALERT SPOILER ALERT! Turns out “Steve” is a little bit…
Say his name five times and try not to die! This 2021 remake was co-written by Jordan Peele (director of Get Out, Us, Nope) and tries to breathe some fresh life into a 2nd tier horror icon character: The Candyman. I will say that there was a lot to like about the tone and style of how it created the tension. The story was…
From the twisted mind of Wes Craven, comes this bizarre horror classic. What I liked most about it was how it had all the tension and stylings of a 90s horror movie, but all the roles were flipped around. The kids were the heroes. The monsters were the helpers. The normies were the sick and twisted villains. If you go in expecting some cookie-cutter…
A decade after the first movie, someone decided to make a sequel that has nothing to do with the first movie aside from a big alligator killing people. Without Robert Forster, there is virtually no acting talent. His replacement? Joseph Bologna. I can't make this stuff up. Sure, it's got Dee Wallace Stone as the reptile expert/detective's wife, but she's barely in it and…
This falls under the beastly "animal/nature" horror sub-genre where some innocent species becomes the deadly, unstoppable force that the characters have to evade and try to kill. Aside from movies like Jaws or Arachnophobia, most of them are pretty bad. However, this one surprised me by not being a total waste of time. The biggest reason being the great Robert Forster who plays the…
Michael Myers is back. Again. I'm starting to feel like this is Groundhog Day with horror movies. This is the sequel to Halloween (2018), where Jamie Lee Curtis came back to finish off Michael once and for all. Spoiler alert: she failed. In this movie, Michael escapes from the burning house trap and goes right back to killing everyone in sight including the beefcake…
Remake alert! Wait, whoa. I was not prepared for this one. I really liked the original Wrong Turn back in 2003. It came out of nowhere and was kind of a spiritual sister to Deliverance. Plus, Eliza Dushku is awesome. Given that my expectations were so low, this new one ended up being rather enjoyable, specifically because it doesn't try to do a beat-by-beat…
This is the fourth movie in this series of anthologies. It starts with a SWAT team doing a drug bust in 1994 and finding horrific stuff in a warehouse. As they come across various TVs, the narrative shifts to what is playing on the TV and each one has its own frightening short story. There is one about a rat man living in the…
This movie should have been called Vampires on a Plane. It could have also benefited from some Samuel L. Jackson. Nadja and her son, Elias, board a long flight from Europe to New York when the plane is hijacked for some elaborate theft or something. The mother is actually a vampire that goes full savage when she can't take her vampire-suppression medicine. Anyone she…
